The Power Of Just Two Words

"Let there be light." A mere two words in Hebrew, yet it was through this command that God made light: "And God said, 'Let there be light,' and there was light" (Genesis 1:3). With just two words God created something which science still does not fully understand, being paradoxically both particle and wave in one, something that can travel for billions of years at seemingly unattainable speeds, something that can be absorbed and bended and reflected and refracted into billions of colors. And He created it out of nothing. It's not like God took a big pot, threw in a bunch of ingredients, cooked it to a boil and out jumped light. He didn't take something He had already created and mold it by hand into light. He merely spoke two words, TWO WORDS, and light came into being.

If just two of God's words are so powerful, how much more powerful are several hundred thousand? How powerful would an entire book of God's words be? Far more powerful than the treat the Bible, I'm afraid. How few of us, if any, really give the Bible the respect and awe it deserves. We have in our hands a book of God's Word, coming from that same God who in just two words created light, yet the greatest tendency, even in my own life, is to treat the Bible as a good book of guidance at best, and perhaps more often as a book that we ought to read more than we do. If we really understood the power of God's Word, if we really saw each and every word in the Bible as potentially having the power of those two words in Genesis 1:3, how much more would we pour over it, study it, memorize it, meditate upon it, and teach it to others? How much more would we lean on it and base our lives upon its teachings, relying on God's power through it to carry us?

Ask yourself if you truly revere the Bible as if it were the power to create light one hundred thousand times over, and when the answer is no ask God to give you that reverence, then dive into His words and get lost in their power. I pray that someday I may understand just how powerful God's Word is and that I may hold it in the proper respect and awe it deserves.

Tribute To A Dear Friend

This morning Woody Oliver announced his resignation from Northlake Baptist Church as he has accepted God's call to the pastorate of Woodfields Baptist Church in Greenwood, South Carolina, and in light of this occasion I would like to take a moment to honor him and his family.

Five years ago Woody brought his wife and three daughters to Dallas in order to follow God's call to attend seminary here even though he had no job lined up. It says much for the faith of the entire Oliver family to make such a move, trusting that God would provide. And, of course, provide He did. Woody joined the staff of Northlake Baptist Church as a singles minister, later becoming assistant pastor.

He came to Northlake during my senior year of high school, but I didn't get to know him until after I started college. Whenever I came into town he was more than happy to have me stop by his office to talk about life and football (he was, after all, a high school football coach before moving to Texas). This summer we met for breakfast most weeks, and those breakfasts were without a doubt the most blessed times of fellowship I have had since leaving Austin and certainly some of the greatest in my life. Our breakfasts were great times talking about life and ministry and struggles and the great things God was doing in our lives as well as great times of prayer. God blessed us with an incredible friendship, one of the best I've ever had.

Woody has an incredible heart for people, an incredible heart for service, an incredible heart for God. He genuinely desires to see the entire body wholeheartedly seeking God and serving in love and does all that he can to achieve that end. He desires to do "ministry with excellence," showing people they are loved in every possible way, from the big picture down to the smallest detail. Few people I've known have had their heart in the right place as much as Woody does. He's incredibly humble and real, something too many pastors lack. And he absolutely loves his wife and his four daughters.

What a family, by the way. One of the godliest I've known and all just as sweet and loving as can be. That their daughters are growing into such godly young women is a testimony to both Woody and Dena's abilities as parents and Christian leaders. And ss much as Dena is blessed to have such a great husband and the girls to have such a great dad, Woody is as blessed (if not moreso) to have such a great wife and daughters.

I thank God for the chance I've had to know the Olivers, for the blessing they've been to me. Northlake will miss them all, as certainly will I. Can't wait to see you in Greenwood in 2 years, Woody. Be sure to find a good place for breakfast.

Me Me Me Me Me, And Why I Like Peter

On the flight to St. Louis I was reading Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz (which, if you haven't read any Donald Miller before, you ought to grab both Blue Like Jazz and Searching for God Knows What, some of the most worthwhile reading you'll ever do). While reading part of the book in which Miller discusses his struggles with self-addiction (self-centeredness) I put the book down to ponder how what he wrote applies to me. And into conviction I did step. God really opened my eyes to how much I seek the affirmation of others, to how much I will let what I think others will think of me rule me. It's not a struggle I've been unaware of, but one whose full extent I did not know.

In seeking affirmation from others I am placing their opinion of me above that of God. It can be difficult to do something that may be what God demands but which I think will make others dislike me, which can mean putting what others think of me above both God and others. Worse still, at times in the past I would talk myself into thinking it somehow virtuous to assuage feelings of conviction and guilt.

I have made great strides in this area in recent years, but it was really a major blow to see just how much further I have to go. I spent a couple days (and a couple of late-night walks) thinking, praying, and getting down about it. I wondered if I'd be able to do what I'll need to do in the field, if maybe God was showing me that I need to back out.

He began to assure me that such was not the case. I came to realize that He had revealed this to me that it may be overcome. I had allowed Satan to get into my head, to make me think (once again) that perfection was needed to serve, and God (once again) reminded me that He does not require perfection. God presented me a mountain and I wondered how I would overcome it; then He reminded me that it would be overcome by Him carrying me over it.

This gets me to why I like Peter. Peter was a serious screw-up. From time to time he seemed to get things, but much of the time he was a failure. If I were going to pick someone to be the rock on which I built anything, especially the church, it wouldn't be Peter. But there was one thing Peter had going for him: he stuck out his neck and tried, never afraid to speak up or step out.

Sure he messes up from time to time: even after he receives the Holy Spirit he needs Paul's rebuke (Galatians 2:11). But because Peter goes all-out for Christ he puts himself in the position to be used by God because he leans on an incredible faith. He shows that if we want to be used by God, what God requires of us is not perfection but effort grounded in faith. After all, it's faith that moves mountains, not perfection, and mountains can't be moved without trying.

I like Peter because I can identify with him as a screw up, and I like Peter because he never lets his mess ups get in the way of wholeheartedly living out his faith.

Walking By Moonlight

Four of the six nights I was at Grandma's I took walks out into the country. My route was about a mile to the other edge of town and then 2 and a third miles up State Route 140 into the country, a 6.7-mile roundtrip. And I wish each walk could have been longer. Living in the city you forget how many stars there are, how bright a full moon is, how quiet things can be. The moon was so bright I literally could have read a book as I walked, and the bluish-silverish glow it casts on everything is beautiful. All I could hear was bugs, birds, dogs and coyotes. When a car came by (which happened rarely as late as it was) I could hear it coming from literally at least a mile and a half away. It was so beautiful, so peaceful, so stunning. At times I'd stop by an open field and just gaze out in amazement and awe at the beautiful nightscapes God had created.

And I realized just how beneficial it can be to take some time and get away from everything that can distract us so that we may focus solely on God. All there was to distract me on those long walks was myself, and while it did succeed from time to time, most of each walk was spent in prayer and praise. God showed me a lot and taught me a lot and dealt with a lot on those four nights, and I know had I not taken those walks none of it would have been seen, taught, or overcome. Whether your world seems to be falling apart or you think all your ducks are in a row, I encourage you to find some time to really get away from everything and truly get alone with God. You'll be blessed indeed and amazed at what He'll do.

Going It Alone

On Monday Grandma hurt her back. She did so doing something I could have easily done for her, but she had thought that she ought to be able to do it herself and so she didn't call me in to help. She wouldn't to go to the doctor unless she absolutely had to. She insisted on still doing everything herself without any help. All this time I'm thinking "Grandma, why won't you just take a break? Why won't you let anyone help? Why won't you go to the doctor?" Then it hit me: in the same situation, I wouldn't act any differently than she was. After all, last November I hurt my knee playing racquetball, finished out the game, then went to classes, didn't go to the Health Center until my fencing professor told me to, still got around primarily on foot, and still spent whole days standing at work. Or this past summer I sprained my ankle playing basketball, kept playing on a borrowed brace, and didn't take a single day off from climbing around on roofs.

This seemingly illogical behavior stems from a mix of self-reliance and stubbornness that go with being an Essenpreis like cultish devotion to Lassie goes with being an Aggie. And as I sat there thinking that maybe I should be a bit less stubborn and self-reliant when it comes to injury and illness, God took things a step further. "You're not just like that when you're physically hurt," the Spirit whispered to me, "that's how you are in general." And It was right.

Not that I can't work with others, but when it comes to me I don't want to have to rely on anyone else, be it limping around on a sprained ankle, traveling across town, paying bills, or keeping up my spiritual well-being. And that's not right. It's stupid, it's prideful, and it stands counter to scripture. Check out Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 or Proverbs 27:17. The Disciples were sent out in twos, Elijah was given Elisha, Adam was given Eve. The New Testament church is a picture of broken believers holding each other up, praying for each other, encouraging one another, teaching and admonishing one another. I CAN'T get by on my own; I know this and I teach this but I still try and live contrary to it anyway. I've grown a lot in recent years in terms of relying on God, and while I still struggle some in this area, I especially struggle in relying on others. It's like I see it as ok to lean on God but not on others, and that just isn't the way God made us. And I know that in doing so I hold myself back spiritually, that I could grow more and overcome more if only I'd stop hobbling around trying to take care of myself on my own. God really smacked me in the face and woke me up to this fault of mine. I pray that, now aware of what I'm doing, I'm able to change.

(Note: Second photo actually from Ukraine, not Illinois ... southern Illinois has yet to have a hard frost this year, much less snow)

Self-Portrait On Idler Lane (Literally)

In case you were wondering what I look like :)

Some Things Never Change...

"The whole life of men in ancient times was one of action and contention; ours on the contrary is a life of laziness. They knew that they were brought into the world for this purpose, that they might labor according to the will of Him who brought them into it; but we, as if spiritual things. I speak not only of the Apostles, but of those who followed them. You see them accordingly traversing all places, and pursuing this as their only business, living altogether as in a foreign land, as those who had no city upon earth."

From John Chrysosotom's second Homily on the Epistle of St. Paul to Titus, written around 400 AD. He also once preached about how church attendance was higher at Christmas and Easter. I guess some things never change.

...But Most Things Do

Being people we don't like change. It scares us. It's a lack of certainty, a lack of stability, a lack of control. We especially don't like when those things dearest to us change as we hate to admit that we even fail to control that which means the most to us.

Grandma's is a place where change is evident. The walls are covered with pictures ranging from the 1940s to 2005, showing family members in all different stages of their lives. My cousins, all but one of whom are younger than I, look different every time I see them. The farm, once full of life, is home to farm animals no more. The house is still there, but even that may soon be gone.

Being there really caused me to reminisce, and reminiscing made me wish that everything would go back to the way that it was, that things wouldn't change. I generally handle change well, but this seemed too much. The thing is, there's no way to stop change. It happens, even when everything in us wants things to stay the same.

And that's ok. In fact, it can even be exciting. If you are saved, you have promises that God will take care of you, that He is watching out for you, that you have great things in your future: "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you" (Isaiah 46:4) "For I know the plans I have for you...plans to prosper you and not to harm you" (Jeremiah 29:11); "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28), just to name a few.

So long as we follow God, the path ahead will be good. And with those promises, change and uncertainty become exciting. We aren't in control and we don't know what's going to happen even tomorrow, much less five years from now, but as believers we know that God has great things in store for us. And what is more exciting than knowing that blessings are in store without knowing what those blessing are? It's like kids at Christmas time: part of the excitement is knowing that the gifts are there under the tree but not knowing what's inside. Life is no different.

That doesn't mean everything will be easy. God never promised that. In fact He promises quite the opposite. I like what the sign at Grandma's church said last week: "When the going gets easy, you may be going the wrong way." As difficult as things may be, though, God is still there, still in control, still handing down blessings out of His perfect grace.

Who knows what the next two years hold in store, or the years after that, or the next five minutes after writing this post, for that matter. And I, for one, am excited about it.

Home Away From Home

Well, I just got back from a week with Grandma in Illinois, and what a week it was.

Grandma lives in a big house on a 12-acre farm on the edge of Greenville, IL (pop. 7000). She’s lived in that house since 1943, when Grandpa came home one day and said (much to Grandma’s surprise), “Well Betty, I bought a house today.” That house was a place that we went every summer when I was a kid, a place outside of the city, alive like no other place I had ever been. There were cows, chickens, turkeys, geese, rats, bullfrogs, ducks, lightning bugs, rabbits, coon hounds, horses. There were open spaces, trees, a pond, and fences you weren’t supposed to climb but you’d occasionally climb anyway. There was family, something especially treasured as we had no family in Dallas. To me that house on the hill is overflowing with happy childhood memories and Grandma’s love, and that makes it a special place in deed.

The animals are gone and the place has changed but the memories remain; I could easily spend days walking those grounds recalling stories from the past. And yet it is not just memories that make it a special place. It is there where the family still congregates as if it were our capitol, so when I go up to Greenville it is at that house that I will see everyone. And it is in that house that Grandma still lives, where I have been able to spend time on my last two trips getting to really know her, to know who she is and where she’s been and what she’s been through.

As if that’s not enough to make this trip an incredible time of reflection and joy, with me heading overseas this is the last time that I’ll be able to see the Essenpreis side of my extended family for 2 years, with the house on the market it may be the last time I ever get to set foot in that special place, and with Grandma at 84 there won’t be too many times with Grandma left. As you can imagine I had a lot to think about (with plenty of time to think and pray with the late night hikes I took to enjoy the starry skies and moonlit nights you just can’t experience in the city), which meant God had a lot to show me and teach me, much of which I’ll post over the next few days (enjoy the suspense).

If Only We All Knew Greek

So I was preparing for my Sunday School lesson and was working through Romans 12:9-21, in which Paul lays out what love in a Christian community should look like. To aid me in this endeavor I was using the Bible study tools at Crosswalk.com, which includes a version of the NASB where you can click on words and see what the original Greek word is, what it means, and where else it's used (link is in the sidebar on the right...search for passages with "NAS with Strong's Numbers"). Fantastic resource (and it's free to boot). Great way for those of us lacking in knowledge of Greek to find some of the shades of meaning lost in translation.

Anyway, so I get to verse 13, which says, "Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality" (NIV). But "share" and "practice," it turns out, aren't great translations. The word for share means "to enter into fellowship, join one's self to an associate, make one's self a sharer or partner." So what Paul is saying is that we are to become partners with those in need in the task of meeting their needs. Don't just hand them a few bucks; work along side them to meet their needs as if those needs were your own.

But that ain't half as interesting as the meaning of the word "practice."

The word translated "practice" in Romans 12:13 can be found in Philippians 3:14 as well. Only here it's translated "press on": "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." And it's in this verse that it's more accurately translated. It means to run swiftly in order to catch something, to pursue, to run after, to seek after eagerly. So we aren't just supposed to practice hospitality, we are to seek out opportunities to show God's love to strangers and guests as one would run after the prize to be won at the end of a race.

Oh how beautiful it would be to be able to read the Bible in the original languages. Oh how even more beautiful it would be if we loved others as Paul encourages us to in this verse.

Getting To The Root Of The Problem

So Tuesday I went to the dentist. I was praying for a clean bill of dental health, if for no reason other than finances. Much to my relief I had no cavities; however, a temporary stainless steel crown I've had for years had become loose and the tooth beneath it had started to decay. My options were to get a crown now or a root canal in Uganda. I opted for the crown now.

So Wednesday I went back in for crown installation part 1. The dentist started drilling. And drilling. And drilling. She started getting really close to the nerve, so close she took an x-ray to see just how close she was. And then back to the drilling. Then she got up and left. In the meantime an assistant came in to gawk at the stub of a tooth that remained. I took her bewilderment that I had been asymptomatic as a bad sign, as if my tooth becoming office gossip wasn't a bad enough one already. You never want to be the patient where everyone says "You've GOT to come look at this one!" Anyway, another dentist, the one that's done my parents' dental work for decades, came in and introduced himself as my second opinion. He took a "spoon excavator," the hand tool used to scrape out tooth decay back before then invention of dental drills, and started slowly, carefully, scraping away what remained. And then he got to the nerve. Root canal time!

The problem with root canal time, of course, being that root canal time costs significantly more than just plain ole crown time. However, the extent to which it's a problem for me is more of my own making than of happenstance. There's a few lessons to be learned here, and if you haven't already picked them up on your own, please do so before you repeat my mistakes. Trust me, it's for your own good.

Lesson 1: Don't Skip Out on Regular Dental Visits

So this was my first trip to the dentist in probably 3 years. What would have happened had I gone earlier? Well, the decay would have been caught long before it found its way down to the nerve, which would have meant just a crown, no root canal. Furthermore, that crown would have been covered by my parents insurance, which leads me to...

Lesson 2: Get the Most Out of Your Parents Insurance Before You Lose It

All I'd be paying is the deductible on the root canal if I had gone in before August 1, but now I've got to pay for 3 months of insurance coverage plus the deductible. I think you can figure out on your own which costs less. So use it before you lose it, or you'll be paying for it out your ears. Which wouldn't be as much of a problem, of course, if you...

Lesson 3: Manage Your Money Wisely and Avoid Credit Cards Like the Plague

If it weren't for poor fiscal decisions my first three (especially first two) years of college, this wouldn't be an issue. Sure, it would still cost the same, but I'd still have plenty of financial breathing room afterwards. The worst of those poor financial decisions, by the way, was the use of credit cards. If you have to decide between using a credit card or going a week without food, then fast. The first couple days can be horrendous, but you're much better of in the long term. Credit cards may seem like your friends, but they're really your enemies. Also understand that small expenses may seem small, but a lot of small expenses add up to be a real big expense, and because they're sneaky like that, they can pose even more threat to your financial health than big purchases. But even if you make these mistakes...

Lesson 4: Don't Regret Anything

Regret is like Worry's hindsighted cousin: just as you can't add a single minute to your life by worrying, you can't get back a single minute of your life by regretting. Learn from your mistakes, certainly. Teach others so they won't make your mistakes, definitely. But don't regret the mistakes you've made because all you can do is make the best of the situation you're now in, of the life you've got left. God forgives you; forgive yourself. I don't regret these mistakes; instead, "forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14).

Joyful Insufficiency

Something to try and wrap your head around:

The Caedmon's Call song "Not Enough" is pretty well summed up by it's chorus: "Everything I do is not enough for You. Everything I do is not enough, it's not enough for You." It's a song about our total insufficiency to live a godly life and seek God. The kicker, though: it's not slow and sorrowful; it's an upbeat, happy, energetic tune. And as such, I think it hits dead on as to how we, as believers, should think about our insufficiency in relation to God. Want some food for thought? There's a nice juicy steak to chew on for a while.

The Feeding Of The Five Thousand In Context: What We Can Learn Before We Even Know There's Only Five Loves And Two Fish

So if you're like me you've only ever heard about Jesus feeding the five thousand a miraculous demonstration of His divine power. Which it is, no doubt. But today, as I was reading through Matthew, God showed me something else in the story, something more convicting, something more applicable to how we live our lives.

To understand you have to go back to the beginning of Matthew 14. The first eleven verses tell how John the Baptist was imprisoned and beheaded. In verse 12 his disciples bury him and then go and tell Jesus. Now, at this point, it's important to understand the relationship between John the Baptist and Jesus. Jesus has enormous respect for John: in Matt 11:12 he says "I tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist." John was Jesus' lead off hitter, so to speak: "A voice of one calling in the desert, 'Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him' " (Isaiah 40:3). It was John who baptized Jesus, kicking off His 3 years of public ministry. John was Jesus' first great follower, even leaping in the womb when they first came close. Their parents were friends, and that John's recognition of Jesus at His baptism isn't treated with any special recognition by Matthew means that the two were likely well acquainted with one another, if not close friends, at the time.

As such, one can imagine that this would be a difficult loss for Jesus. And perhaps it even set Him to thinking of His own execution to come, something that would later be so stressful it would cause His capillaries to literally burst, resulting in the sweating of blood at Gethsemane. One would expect Him to mourn, to want to withdrawl from the world for a time to deal with the death of his friend. And in Matt 14:13 He does: "When Jesus heard what happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place."

But the crowds followed. They would not leave Him be. So what was his response? What would yours be? I can tell you that I'd probably be quite upset, not want to have anything to do with them, and tell them to go away, perhaps with a few harsh words. I think most of us would. But that's not what He does. "When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick" (Matt 14:14). What a picture of selflessness, what a picture of love. Jesus puts aside His own sorrow and His own troubles to minister to the crowds who won't let Him be. But it doesn't end there.

"As evening approached, the disciples came to Him and said, 'This is a remote place, and it's already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food' " (Matt 14:15). At this point, if I were in Jesus' position, I'd probably be thinking, "You know what, you're right. Send them home. I can finally get some time to myself. After all, I've healed their sick. I've shown them love. I've ministered to their needs. Time to take care of me." And off I'd send them. But He doesn't. "Jesus replied, 'They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat' " (Matt 14:16). Not only does He minister to them AGAIN by providing food, but in doing so He's keeping them around longer, prolonging the time until He finally gets to that solitude He had been seeking in the first place.

The miracle in this story isn't just the multiplication of the available food: it's also the incredible self-sacrificing love demonstrated by Jesus. At a time when anyone else would be thinking of his own needs, Jesus puts Himself aside for the sake of those who are in need. And we should be the same way. No matter the time of day, no matter what's on our minds, no matter what the circumstances of our lives, no matter what we must get done, we must, MUST always be willing to put it all aside for the sake of those in need. That's what it means to love others. If we do not, whom do we love but ourselves?

Convicting? It is to me. I pray that we can all live such selfless, loving lives that even when we would most feel like putting ministry to others aside, we would instead put ourselves aside and care for them in love.